BRANT WATCH

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
An all-inclusive yet clearly, for legal purposes, satirical and made-up website for brant brothers sightings, news, gossip, rumors, photos, and other necessaries. Original concept by Scott Indrisek, a slovakian socialite. For legal purposes, written and hosted by someone else entirely.

image

Harry at the Steers ‘n Beers Oscars after party, hosted by Western Beef, Budweiser Triple-X Select, and the ghost of Spin magazine. The event was held at the historic ranch of Belvedere Strumpkin, a tobacco scion known for his vocal and financial support of astroturf groups dedicated to “overthrowing the Jew-spiracy known as Hollywood,” according to the Google cache of his former website, StrumpkinVSTheWorld.biz. Most guests were ignorant of the politics of their host—who, wheelchair-bound at 98, watched the proceedings from a specially constructed floating dais, wearing a vintage slim-fitting t-shirt that read PUTTING THE PARTY BACK IN APARTHEID. Harry was joined at the event by Veronica Keister, foreground, an extra in Argo. “They cut my goddamn scene,” the actress lamented. “Do you remember that bit where Ben Affleck is in his hotel room, staring out the window, with the sun sort of shining in and just casually glinting off his perfect abs? Well my character was supposed to come into the room and start applying oil to his back and shoulders, in a subtle and poetic manner. I did great, but ultimately Ben didn’t think the scene made sense within the larger context of the film.” Marnie Stern performed a set of post-hardcore Hank Williams covers at the event. Peter II told fourteen people derivations of an anecdote about the time he mistook Anne Hathaway for a meerkat. 

  1. brantwatch posted this